Only Idiots Blackmail Mycroft Holmes
by therunawaypen
Summary: Mycroft receives an email threatening to expose his relationship with DI Greg Lestrade. The British Government is more annoyed than worried. Especially when he has lunch plans. SLASH Mystrade


_This was for __**theopoiesis**__ on Tumblr, who wanted a blackmail fic. It's a bit short, but I hope you enjoy!_

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_£5,000,000 or political leaders you meet with will know what a freak you are._

_You have three days._

It was a very short email, Mycroft noted, not to mention slightly vague. Honestly, "freak?" Not to mention it wasn't specified _which _leaders the blackmailer intended to contact.

But seeing the attached picture, he could figure it out for himself.

It was a very familiar image. Familiar because it was him. And Gregory. In their home. Familiar because he recognized based on the clothes they were wearing that the picture had been taken on Valentine's Day.

He remembered that evening vividly because he didn't often celebrate the holiday, but Gregory had surprised him by wearing his tailored Armani suit for their dinner (the suit had been a previous gift from Mycroft, but the DI had stated he didn't need fine clothes, especially when he worked on the streets of London so much). But oh, how dashing Gregory had looked in crisp black and white. Gregory had even taken to wearing one of the many Brioni ties Mycroft had given him (a lovely emerald satin that stood out against his brown eyes), and when he saw that the DI had even gone so far as to wear gold cufflinks, he had almost gone weak in the knees (keyword: almost).

They had gone to Mycroft's favorite French restaurant, a quiet (and discrete) establishment tucked away from the busy London streets. Given the special occasion, Mycroft had decided to forgo his diet and indulge himself, even getting Gregory to eat foie gras. It was over dessert (a decadent lavender crème brûlée ) that Mycroft had given Gregory his gift: a custom made Rolex watch, which Mycroft had hoped the DI would actually wear on a day to day basis.

Gregory had done him one better, getting down on one knee and proposing. An act that Mycroft hadn't seen coming (Gregory later told him he enlisted Sherlock's help in keeping it a surprise).

Mycroft hadn't reacted to Gregory's romantic proposal, save for a simple 'yes' at the restaurant, until they had returned to the comfort of their home. There the older Holmes allow himself to unravel with passionate kisses with his fiancé, followed by a night of glorious lovemaking.

And _that_ was made Mycroft so furious at the blackmailer's gall. He hardly cared about being blackmailed in the first place, _that_ would be easily taken care of. Nor was he insulted that the blackmailer had thought to use his homosexuality as a means to threaten his global political relations, Mycroft was discrete enough to not let his personal life bleed into his professional life.

What made Mycroft want to start a war was the fact that the blackmailer had tried to use a picture of the _happiest_ night of Mycroft's life and turn it into something to be _ashamed _of. Not to mention they had invaded the sanctity of their _home_, invading their privacy…

No, that wouldn't do at all.

A low buzzing jerked Mycroft from his thoughts. It was his cell phone, his personal one, not the Blackberry he used for business.

_Are you free to grab lunch before cake tasting? GL_

A small smile tugged on Mycroft's lips. Gregory was terrible when it came to food, eating take out whenever he could get it, but working in the streets of London kept him fit and spry. So whenever Mycroft had the chance, he took the DI to places that served quality food. And considering the fact that they had already scheduled to taste wedding cakes today…

_Absolutely. Shall I send a car for you? MH_

Mycroft took a moment while he waited for Gregory's response to send Anthea a quick text asking her to his office.

His lovely PA was prompt as always, shutting the door quietly behind her as she walked into the office, "Problems, Mister Holmes?"

Another buzz from his phone.

_Would it stop you if I said no? I'll see you at wherever you've decided we're eating. GL_

Mycroft was already on his feet, smoothing nonexistent creases in his dress slacks, "Yes. It appears that someone is trying to threaten me by using my relationship with Gregory. I would like you to find out everything about the sender of this email." He walked Anthea to sit at his desk and examine the email for herself.

The young woman set down her Blackberry, "Would you like me to do anything about it?" She looked at him with a quirked eyebrow.

Oh, it would be very tempting to have Anthea completely _ruin_ the suspect while he and Gregory were out to lunch

But why let her have all the fun?

"No, simply gather information for me. I shall deal with it once I return." He nodded, grabbing his umbrella. "And, if you could limit the number of resources you use, that would be much appreciated."

It wasn't that Mycroft didn't want anyone to know that he was being blackmailed, or that he was ashamed of his relationship with Gregory. It simply just wasn't anyone else's business what Mycroft did outside the office, especially since it did not affect his work in any way.

Anthea nodded, "I'll get right on it, sir."

"Thank you, my dear." He nodded to her before walking out to the waiting car for him. Now, to find a good place for lunch…

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_Well I hope you liked it! Let me know what you think!_


End file.
